You might as well hear it straight from the source. I had an appointment with Dr. Moore, my oncologist, today. The discussion was not uplifting.
About 5 weeks ago, I reported to her that I was exhausted. She decided that the chemotherapy had worn me down. My therapy consists of taking 6 pills a day for a week, followed by no pills for a week, and so on. On the weeks I am taking pills, I get infused once a week on Monday. On weeks Ido not take any pills, I do not get an infusion.
Dr. Moore suggested that my cancer markers were down and that I could take a vacation from the infusions for a month, but that I should keep on with the pills. Her theory was that the vacation would allow my body time to recover from the poison they pump into me. If all went well, my cancer markers would stay the same or go down. Or they might go up, which is not good, since that means the cancer is active and being fought by the infusion. The tumor is definitely there, but there is no point in going looking for it, as no significant treatment is available, anyway.
Unfortunately, during the vacation, my cancer markers went from 350 to 498, which means that my liver tumor is doing its evil work deep in my liver, as expected. So, I am back on chemo next Monday to hopefully bring the marker number down. She did not think it was promising.
For the first time, she brought up “the end.” She explained that the tumor would grow and the pain would increase. The tumor would take most of the nutrients from my food and I would gradually lose weight. This is already happening. Eventually, the fatigue that I now am experiencing will increase to the point I am bedridden and will require nursing and hospice care.
She told me I should die peaceably and probably as I sleep an exhausted sleep. The pain will be manageable with the drugs.
I asked her if I had one last summer in me. She responded by saying, “Do I look like a gypsy?” For the first time, she seemed downbeat. When pressed, she said that the summer was not out of the question, but it would be dicey. She could make no promises.
So that is where I am. I am not surprised by this information. I am still hoping for one last summer, my last hurrah, if you will. As I have said before, I am going to ride this down to the ground. We shall see.
Mike out.
No reasonable person has a clue of how to respond to such news. Just know that my prayers for you, Mike, continue unabated. Even in the darkest hour—as medical professional may predict—God is more than able to smite your tumor and bring total healing to your body.
ReplyDeleteI pray that God, by the power of the Holy Spirit, will touch your body from the crown of your head to the soles of your feet with absolute healing. That God, who knows every cell within your body, will banish every defective cell and cause your proper cells to grow and multiply and restore your strength.
Even as God continues to do His work in and through you, may He come along side and encourage you to rest within the shelter of His loving arms.
Hello Mike. Chuck Huston here. I remember your Dad, who kind of took me under his wing when I first came back to town. He'd call me out of the blue and say let's go flying. He knew then I had a love for planes and was a student pilot. Unfortunately, I'm still a student pilot, but close to getting my ticket. I just wanted you and Lynn to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. My Dad has been gone now for over 14 years and I miss him, terribly, still. I know your faith will carry you, and we all have to die of something eventually. Your Dad will be waiting with open arms, as I know my Dad also will. If you need anything at all, please don't hesitate to ask. Would love to go flying with you just for the memory. I always thought you were the best lawyer I have ever seen in Court, and have many talents beyond that. Record your music, you have already left a legacy. Perhaps we can write a song together before it gets too late in the game for both of us.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update, Mike so we know how to pray, I agree with Dean, but I want to make sure I tell you how grateful I am to count you as my friend, I love you and cherish all the time you & Lynne have blessed Morgan & myself with. Praying for you both regarding health, another summer at the cottage & God's love flowing over you both like a warm blanket.
ReplyDeleteStill here. Still praying. With you.
ReplyDeleteThis is the first time i leave a comment. I found you through Janelle s blog months ago . Just wanted to say that i m praying for you and your wife for strength and healing. Today i will pray that you have your one last summer....
ReplyDeleteMy deepest thoughts are with you, Mike. I keep updated with this blog. What a neat thing for Lynn to do.
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